Say what you like about Giles Coren, he is funny in his own right, as well as having a famously funny father. His writing shows signs of strain at times - he needs to try harder if he is to achieve the late Alan Coren's effortless brilliance.
Victoria Coren, on the other hand, has the surname and not much else. She qualifies as this week's dozy bint for claiming - in The Guardian, of course - that Muslim women should be running the country:
But what if [the cabinet] were all Muslim women? Picture the scene, and be confused to note that you can't help suspecting things would surely be better – better run, fairer, more efficient, more practical and more peaceable – even as you know that it would never, ever be allowed to happen.
It would happen if Eton were all-Muslim and all-female. An alternative universe dances before us, where somebody trod on a butterfly and everything turned out different. As we step back out of the time machine, butterfly corpse on boot, we meet the cockney royals, the female establishment, the white traffic wardens, the black Bruce Forsyth, the gay army leaders. Ah, I suppose the grass is always greener. It would still rain on bank holidays.
The funny thing is, not only are we a million years from having 10 Baroness Warsis in the cabinet, they don't even want the Muslim Eton in Lancashire. The Bishop of Burnley wants the school placed elsewhere, lest it inflame local bigots. Is that how we do things, though, Your Grace?
Miss Coren knows nothing of Islam - Muslim women are not permitted to rule under Sharia, and if they get power in Britain, it gives a false sense of security about Islam. Think of those Muslim "feminists" like Shirin Ebadi, whose campaigning for "women's rights" means nothing without a rejection of the belief system that denies them.
Besides, Muslims couldn't run a booze up in a brewery, and we know how important that is to Britain.