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Old Year Resolutions

I just can't face another chocolate.

Anyone who knows me will not believe this, but it's true. The fact is I have been stuffing myself with chocolates and all manner of rich food for the past seven days, and, incredible as it seems, I don't want another one. I have eaten my fill, and while Phil hasn't had enough, I have.

Overindulgence does strange things to the brain. As well as the "no more chocolate" blasphemy, I have been thinking some very un-Jacksonian thoughts, viz:

  1. Teetotalism is a valid option.
  2. Vegetarians are not cranks at all.
  3. I respect vegans. They are not whey-faced cadaverous lunatics.
  4. The EU is a wonderful institution, staffed by people who have our best interests at heart.
  5. "May have" or "might have"? What does it matter?
  6. Esperanto is an excellent idea. English, you see, is like London: old, sprawling, poorly designed and saddled by history with strange street names like "Pudding Lane". Esperanto is better. It is like Milton Keynes: the cows are concrete and don't smell; the streets are designed as an efficient grid system and the houses all look alike.
  7. Hugh was quite right about "reference". I was utterly wrong about this and about so many other things, and it was very presumptuous of me to debate him.
  8. Apostrophe's in the wrong place's? Who cares?
  9. I don't mind America being Top Nation instead of us. It means we can adopt all those wonderful words like "transportation", "obligated", "favor", and "train station" and we can write y'all and debate y'all about them.
  10. Don't you just love the French? I wish Napoleon had won.

And don't imagine that these un-Jacksonian notions are merely passing fancies. I will hold to them for the rest of the year.